As the nest empties...

As the nest empties...

As I sit in our empty nest, surrounded by the echoes of laughter and the memories of a bustling household, I cannot help but feel a mix of emotions. The realisation that my role as a full-time mom is now redundant hits me like a wave, leaving me simultaneously nostalgic and apprehensive about the future. With nearly all four of our children having flown the coop in pursuit of their own dreams and adventures, I find myself standing at the threshold of a new chapter in life, one that is both daunting and exhilarating.

For years, my identity has been intricately woven with the responsibilities of motherhood. From the late-night feedings to the frantic school runs and the endless stream of football games and dance recitals, my days were a whirlwind of activity, love, and chaos. My purpose was clear: to nurture and guide the children as they navigated the complexities of growing up. I did this daily without thinking about what the next stage would like, never considered what it would like once they left home and honestly never thought it was end!

But now, as I stare at the quiet rooms once filled with the sounds of childish chatter, I cannot help but wonder what comes next. Our house, as always, felt like a home. It has been messy, chaotic, sometimes looking like a council library with them all studying on the kitchen table and at other times resembling a frat house filled with larger than life loud, rumbunctious, and energetic big kids!  Our 2 Labradors wander the house looking for them, I am sure thinking ‘where have they gone’?

The prospect of an empty nest is a bittersweet one, signalling the end of an era while beckoning towards a future filled with endless possibilities. It's a sentiment shared by countless parents around the world, a universal experience that transcends cultural and societal boundaries. For many of us, the transition from full-time mum to empty nester can feel like a loss, leaving us grappling with feelings of loneliness, purposelessness, and even grief.

Yet, amidst the melancholy, there is also a glimmer of hope, a silver lining waiting to be discovered.  Motherhood has taught me so much patience, resilience, to listen more and talk less, to help shape them all but don’t tell them what to do.  Let them fall and make mistakes, help pick up their pieces, be there for them but don’t fix it all.

So now a year on since our last finished school and I feel the dust has settled and I can prioritise things that are important to me.  More time with my partner, slower mornings, running when I want, a bowl of cereal for dinner or just a glass of wine while watching Netflix.  Life now seems less structured, less planned and more time to reignite passions long forgotten and to pursue dreams deferred.

One such dream is my small business, Samsara Lifestyle, a venture born out of my love for holistic living, giving back and wellness. For years, it has lingered in the back of my mind, a seed waiting to be planted and nurtured. And now, with the so many of the demands of motherhood behind me, I finally have the time and energy to devote to its growth and success. Time to become a start-up business and create something just for me.

I realise motherhood is never over. My 86-year-old mum will a test to that.  But now I get to look from afar.  I watch one of them complete their university course and travel the world with much gusto and carpe diem, another move interstate to pursue his love of a beach life while studying and working full time.  The 2 youngest settling into their courses, one trying varying jobs and creating her own side hustle, while the other one embraces every social opportunity out there while not considering how much it all costs.  All different, but all loved. Our dinner catch ups while not every night are filled with interesting conversations political statements, new music, what mum must wear and what I must not wear, travel dreams, their ups and downs. All this brings so much joy and fulfilment to me.

As he left our house to move interstate and fulfill his own dream, our son reminded me ‘mum you need to find a purpose that is not just your job!’  Everyday as I work on my Samsara Lifestyle, I revisit this and while I am not making loads of money or becoming a household name ,I am grateful to be doing something just for me, that make me happy, gives me a sense of purpose and encourages me to take risks, put myself out there and believe anything is possible.

I will always be their mother, I will take their late-night texts, I will answer their cooking questions, I will listen as they complain about work, I will wipe a tear from there face as their heart is broken and I will, if needed, drive 300 kilometres to a music festival if they are feeling unsafe.  I will always be their biggest cheerleader, but I will do all of the above on their terms and only when they want or need me to be.

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